Dating Kit

Adventures of a Single Girl…

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Kitionary

I’m Aussie, and it shows, because we abbreviate lots of words. What we don’t abbreviate, we lengthen! Here are a few words and phrases I use. Some of them are mine all mine, but some are just those which have found their way into my vernacular.

Awks – short for awkward, meaning uncomfortable or weird. “Man, it was so awks!!”

Awkwardo – long for awkward, but with a bit more emphasis, like, “awk-waaardo.” Often sung.

Mentale – mental, but my way. Pronounced, “mentahlay.”

Hilares – short for hilarious, because you know, most things are! Pronounced, “hilairs”

Faux beau – GAP Male Scale and World Male Scale

Resti – why go to a restaurant when you can go to a resti? It’s the same thing of course, but my version!

Pash – a kiss but with a bit more action than just lips!!

Pash rash – the itchy and scratchy you get on your face (or elsewhere, you lucky devil) after a big long pash, usually caused by his stubble, stubble that may or may not have been there when you first started pashing, if you’ve had a lovely long session!

Pashmina – usually this is an item of clothing but to me, it’s

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Kit rocks up

A while ago, I met a woman at a Meetup event. Nooooo, this isn’t going to be that kind of story! Anyway, usually when you become friends with another Meetup member, you discuss the kinds of groups you’re in and events you attend.

She mentioned that she sometimes goes to dinners and movie groups. I remember scoffing at those. I’m good on a first date, including dinner dates, but I’ve never been good at going up to a group in a club and joining in. So, for me, going to dinner with a group of strangers ranks up there in my worst nightmares, which includes being in an elevator with someone I can’t stand, and being in a car for any length of time with someone I don’t know (taxi drivers aside, as I’m there for a purpose). You know when a mechanic drops you off at work while your car is at their garage? That’s extremely awkwardo for me.

However, as I’ve been trying to expand my circle of friends, and I’m trying to be brave, and put myself out there, when I saw a group was holding a dinner nearby in a few days, I st25.06.16arted to talk myself into it. They’re called “Rock Up,” which I loved the idea of. And, it’s a phrase I use all the time, so it seemed quite serendipitous.

Two nights later, I found myself walking in to an Indian resti in a nearby suburb. I actually was pretty calm, which I was surprised about. When I reached the resti, I saw a table of about 10 people, and no other big groups. Before I could think about it, I walked in and asked if they were the Meetup group.  The guy who responded said, ‘nope!’ but I immediately knew he was joking.

I was welcomed and given a seat, and the woman next to me started talking to me.

Everyone was at least 15 years older than me, and none even slightly sexually attractive, but that doesn’t mean I couldn’t have an interesting night with new friends.

And that I did. While I sat quietly at times, listening to the old friends around me talking, I was also included at other times, and in other instances, I was able to insert myself into the convo. Fabulous! Go me!!

I definitely found that I had very little in common with my fellow diners, apart from some of us living in the same area, but we had some very spirited conversations and I was rapt about that. When I go out with my friends, we talk about our lives, what’s going on, our hopes and dreams, but we don’t seem to talk about what’s going on in the world.

That’s partly my fault because I refuse to watch the news, so I’m not always up to date on current affairs. However, despite that, and my new pals each being about 7000 years old, I was able to run with the wolves, and hold my own with a group of strangers on a wide range of topics. I was amazed at myself and oh so proud. I was a rockstar for a couple of hours!!

By the end of the night I’d joined a couple more groups which were recommended to me by some of my pals and I look forward to attending more events. I don’t know what they’ll be, but if I could be this brave once, I can do it again, and imagine how much braver I can be the next time!

What do you do to expand your group and push yourself into new worlds?

Xx Kit

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“Hey baby I’d like to talk to you. How about coming back to my room….” Ned- Part Four

Continuing from, Wishin’ and hopin’ Ned Part Three, Dating in the city- Melbourne, the Fashion Capital (includes some Date Wear Tips), Net Part Two, and Neighbours: everybody needs good neighbours.” Ned- Part One.

With three dates down and no tongues down anyone’s throat, the next morning Ned texted and continued the conversation. I love when guys do that, just because the sun has gone down doesn’t necessarily spell the end of the convo- but some guys think it does.

So he mentioned that he’d left his ipad under the seat of my car. I teased that it was a smooth move, leaving it there, and that I’d checked and it was there, and he just thanked me and said he’d speak to me later. Pfft.

That night he texted and asked if he could come and pick it up. Um, no thank you!

I wasn’t keen to have him come to my house yet, I’d seen how pristine his was, and I was in the middle of doing a whole house (cupboards and all) overhaul, so it wasn’t the time. Plus, I just wasn’t ready. We didn’t have that physical comfortability yet. (Is that a word? I’m sure you get the drift, anyway.)

I did a shifty and pretended I hadn’t seen the text- and as we live near the same station, I knew how long it would take him to get home from when he texted, as he’d given me a clue of where he was at the time.

Thus, nearly an hour later I texted him and said, ‘oops!’ and offered to bring it to his house.Ned pt 3 romantic

He accepted and I went round soon after. It was bucketing down, and freezing; the perfect night for a cuddle on the couch.

By now, you’re probably wondering why I haven’t thrown caution to the wind and kissed him. Well, it’s easy: I’m an old fashioned gal. I love the anticipation of that first kiss, and all the little nuances that lead up to it. The accidental hand touch on the seat between you, then all the less than accidental touches once it’s evident that the other person is cool with it. I love the dance, the flirting, the build up. To me, that’s foreplay. So, while I’m one for making it clear, and definitely for putting myself into such a situation that would make it easier for him to do that, I’m not going to jump the gun and take matters into my own lips. I’ve done it before, and missed out on that tingly tension, so I don’t do it anymore.

Thus, rainy weather or sunny, I’d decided I wasn’t going to throw myself at him, or even make it too easy- it was time for him to show me if he likes me. So I went in and said hi and he did too, and I took up position in front of the wall heater. No hug, no kiss. It was like I was his neighbour popping by to borrow sugar.

We chatted while he finished his tea, and, we went out the back while he had his after dinner smoke. Then back inside. Doesn’t it sound completely boring? That’s because it was- no fireworks or anything.

I was so uncomfortable that I kinda thought I should just leave, but then I thought it would look rude, after having come out on a freezing, raining winter’s night. So I decided I’d make the most of it and see if he got his act together.

Eventually he suggested we sit on the couch, as we were watching a bit of The Voice. It was okay, but it was a three seater and guess where he sat? One end. I sat kinda between the other two cushions- easily in his 6 foot something tall arms’ length. He got up to get something and came back and sat marginally closer. I’m telling you, I still had my coat on, that’s how awkward it was, I didn’t know whether I was staying 5 minutes or an hour.

I gave in a couple of times, and during joking moments I gave him a bit of a punch on the arm (so very Gilbert Blythe of me). With other guys, that would be a huge green light- but no, not for him.

We got talking about his flat mate- who was out but due home at any minute. It was weird too, and I was getting a bit uncomfy about it because the front door opens directly towards the couch. So she’d have seen us before we’d have seen her.

We weren’t pashing or doing anything I’d be ashamed for someone to see, but that was the whole problem: we weren’t doing anything. We were doing less than anything. I have male friends whose houses and company I’m more comfy in and I’ve never done anything with them either. It was totally awkwardo.

At that point, all I could think Ned pt 3 awkwardof was that if we were going to be walked in on, I’d actually rather be seen doing something than be seen sitting there like 11 year old wall flowers at a school social. And right there, I hoped he wouldn’t ask me to go to dinner with his friends, as he’d mentioned the previous night.

While sitting on his couch watching Foxtel I mentioned that my Foxtel remote was broken and thus was causing me pain to use, as several buttons were stuck. He said he had a spare in the country- where he was again going on the weekend- and that he’d bring it back for me. That was sweet of him, but I didn’t bank on him following through, or even just remembering. I mean, so far, he wasn’t exactly one for following through on so called dates, was he? Though maybe they’re not dates! Maybe they’re just a girl and a guy hanging out? Nope, see above, if this is that, then I’ll just hang with my current guy friends with whom I’m super comfy.

If we’d been at my house, for sure a move would’ve been made. we weren’t at my house, we were at his and the only thing getting tangled was the fairy floss in my head as I tried to figure out what the hell was going on!

Soon enough I said I’d head off, and Ned said he’d go for a smoke- so we went out the front and he smoked under the eaves while we chatted. It was raining and my car was parked about 40 metres away in the street. He made a joke about me not getting wet but made no attempt to walk me to the car, or to hug me or anything. The awkwardness continued and as I anteloped back to my car I thought, what a fucking idiot! He’s seen me four times and no moves. He’s not interested at all, and fuck knows if I am, but it’s waning exponentially. The things I do for ‘blog’!!

Now, I’m not saying that I only dated him for the blog. But, without it, I doubt I’d have hung around this long. My writer’s curiosity made me wonder how many times he could see me without actually making a bloody move?!

What could it be? Apart from the lack of physicality and natural flirtation, we get along really well!

Chime in and tell me what you think!

Xx Kit

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